Co dependency

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2008
Co dependency
4
Sun, 09-23-2012 - 12:13am
My boyfriend is co dependent. He does all he can to help others & his happiness is depended on how I feel.

He gets scared when I'm slightly mad. Like he thinks he's walking on a pile of egg shells when he's walking on 2 sands of eggshells.

He said he has high expectations on how he makes me feel.

So I feel like I can never be mad. I'm bipolar but stable on meds. But I still have normal mood swings.

I love him. His family loves me. His family is like a family to me that I never had. I depend on him. I call & text him a lot.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-20-2012
Sun, 10-21-2012 - 6:23pm

Well sounds great that you have such a caring guy...  it's very valuable to have someone that's dedicated to take care of you that way.

He loves you, his family loves you, what's the matter then?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2006
Mon, 09-24-2012 - 11:54am

yeah..I know what you're talking about.my ex is bipolar and it was a mess! Never going to ever go that again.I feel that if people don't want to take responsibility for their actions and they can IF they were to take their meds...then that's it...they're on their own.It was hell dealing with someone who was always upset about things that were no big deal but it's the illness..you know?You can only make yourself happy and no one else...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Sun, 09-23-2012 - 7:41pm

Have you explained to him what being bipolar is like?  Has he done any reading or perhaps gone to a therapy appt. w/ you?  The reason I ask is that my exH was bipolar so I'm on the opposite side.  I would often try to do things to "make him happy" when I knew he was depressed until I realized that it wasn't up to me to make him happy--he really needed to figure out how to do that himself.  Also, how do you react when you get mad?  Because my ex could get very irritable about minor things so it really was like walking on eggshells because it was kind of unpredictable.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Sun, 09-23-2012 - 3:14am

Confident_resilient, do you have a question?   Or perhaps you're just venting...