Compatible?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2004
Compatible?
2
Sat, 03-13-2004 - 11:27am
He's a perfectionist. I'm just interested in getting it done. He thinks and thinks then plans before acting. I get it done while he's thinking about thinking about it. His deliberation annoys me. My "getting it done" impresses him. I know I can"t change him. The question is "How do I learn to gladly accept the differences between us while inside I'm highly frustrated?" The relationship is definitely worth putting some work into it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-18-2003
In reply to: pking2004
Sat, 03-13-2004 - 1:42pm
I believe that in relationships there needs to be those opposites. Think of it this way, maybe when you are "getting it done" you have overlooked something that he has noticed. Appreciate that he does thoroughly think things through. Tell him that he does take a lot of time thinking when he can be doing. It doesn't take a scientist to do them both at the same time... But I think that you should tell him that you are becoming frustrated. If you don't tell him, how will he know. You can become resentful when you are "getting things done". Resentment is a warning sign in relationships. So talk to him and if that doesn't work, then appreciate it and accept him for who he is. Being picky isn't all that bad as it sounds.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
In reply to: pking2004
Sat, 03-13-2004 - 4:21pm
You answered your own question. Question: "How do I learn to gladly accept the differences between us while inside I'm highly frustrated?" Answer: Keep reminding yourself that "The relationship is definitely worth putting some work into."

I don't think a relationship "needs" opposites. I personally find it much easier to be on more of the same page with my SO. However, I know people who are opposites who seem to make things work ok. Some people like a bit of a challenge to keep things interesting, while others enjoy contentment in an even keel. Whatever works for you! Good luck.