Confused

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2008
Confused
6
Sat, 06-21-2008 - 3:48pm
Hi Im needing a little help my boyfriend of 2 1/2 yrs is still "legally Married" I know everyone is like whoa stupid girl but when we met he told me they had been seperated for about 4 yrs they just have never filed for divorce or seperation so i question him about it alot not everyday when are you going to file i have actually gone down to the court house my self filled out the paperwork and all he needed to do was sign and pay because it will be an easy uncontested divorce they have 2 kids so he is a truck driver and doesnt see his kids often unless he is in their state so he is on his way there now and what pisses me off is he will be staying there i have no problem with him seeing his children at all i have 3 of my own but i NEVER EVER EVER stay at his house or would i ever ask he will come pick them up and leave he is out of state as well And he would NEVER stay here. BUt my boyfriend will make comments oh the wife is going to take us to dinner and other comments he says no reason to worry they are just friends BUT i say if you dont want to be married to someone you will get a divorce i know i did! and he says they are procrastinators yet when she called and i answered all the sudden papers were in the mail well i called BS she was pissed i answered the phone well sure enough no papers! that was 2 months ago so i would love to marry this man but that will never happen still married so what do i do i cannot force some one to get a divorce and i want to be remarried to someone that wants to be with me and i think its disrespectful for him not to get this over with. any suggestions might be helpful thanks
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-11-2004
Sat, 06-21-2008 - 5:35pm

There's not anything you can do. If your boyfriend wanted to be divorced, then he'd be divorced. For whatever reason, he and his wife have both decided that they want to stay married to each other.

If you want to marry someone who wants to be with you, then find yourself another man. This one wants to stay married to his wife. He doesn't want to marry you or he would have taken the steps to start the process already.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2008
Sat, 06-21-2008 - 5:40pm
It sounds like this guy is jerking you around and getting his cake and eating it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Sat, 06-21-2008 - 9:46pm

I stayed legally married to my ex for a number of years.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 06-22-2008 - 12:33am

Welcome to the board goddess_hotmamato3,


I agree with the others... you can't make him and if he wanted to be divorced, he would be.


Think of this too: it's safe to stay married, that way he doesn't have to get married (remarried).

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 11:48am
Hmmm...if he never gets divorced then he can't marry you.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-01-2008
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 12:03pm

You went to the courthouse, got papers, filled them out and all he needed to do was sign them.

 

 

 

 

 

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