Confused about my relationship

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2007
Confused about my relationship
3
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 12:47pm

My Boyfriend and I have been going out for a little over a year, and We are completely opposite from one another, but we do have alot in common. I love him but Im just worried hes not the one for me, and I dont want to go on longer and have it be even harder to leave. I have lived with him pratically since the day we met, we have been in seprable. We have lived together for a year, and its hard to imagine life without him. He hates my friends and doesn't approve of me going out with them. Hes 23 and Im 20. Im love him but I dont know if its enough, he has alot of anger issues and trust issues and I wonder if he'll ever change and when the subject get brought up he always tells me if I think he is going to change then I should leave, Im confused and unsure of what to do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 1:15pm

Honestly, it sounds like there are several reasons to move on;

1)You are young and have many years ahead of you to date and find out who you are without being tied down.

2)He has anger issues which may only escalate into further and worse abuse.

'he always tells me if I think he is going to change then I should leave,'

3)He is right!

Good luck. Find someone who treats you well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2007
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 1:23pm
Im scared. I mean he has helped me alot over this year, like one I dont drive and he has taken me to work everyday for the last year, amoungst many other places, I know he cares, but sometimes I dont feel that he cares enough to change. I kind of feel dependant on him, and life will be much harder finacially for me, and sometimes I get the feeling he likes me being dependant on him. How do I get over the fear of being alone?
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Thu, 07-26-2007 - 1:32pm

Do you have a place to go? Do you have family to live with? Start there. Can you get a license or is it a medical reason you don't drive. You and he have created this situation where he can control you but only YOU are responsible for your own happiness.

Seek counseling to figure out why you stayed with this man and have such a fear of being without a man.