It sounds as though you have what a real marriage is based on, he just labels love differently. You know what's great? That he wants to go to counseling with you and that he's affectionate and intimate with you. I think those actions mean more than any label.
If he's thinking of "in love" as that feeling when you first get into a new relationship with butterflies in your stomach, then that could very well be gone forever... But really, a great relationship is what you have already and I think the process of getting through this is simply going to entail him coming to the realization that he really loves what he has.
It sounds as though you have what a real marriage is based on, he just labels love differently. You know what's great? That he wants to go to counseling with you and that he's affectionate and intimate with you. I think those actions mean more than any label.
If he's thinking of "in love" as that feeling when you first get into a new relationship with butterflies in your stomach, then that could very well be gone forever... But really, a great relationship is what you have already and I think the process of getting through this is simply going to entail him coming to the realization that he really loves what he has.
Welcome to the board sparklemom,
I agree with the label thing.... thankfully he's willing to explore it in counseling with you.
Reading material to help reconnect :
Relationship Rescue, Phil McGraw (do the exercies together)
Five Love Langagues, Gary Chapman
The 10 Second Kiss, Ellen Kreidman