Daughter and Online BF-Meeting in Sept
Find a Conversation
Daughter and Online BF-Meeting in Sept
| Wed, 08-13-2008 - 10:34pm |
I posted about this a couple of months ago, that my daughter broke up with her bf of many yrs so she could become a couple with a guy in another country (we're in US, he's in Australia). They have never met, only talked on the phone and through webcam. He was, and maybe is, unemployed and I have reason to believe my daughter has helped him financially. The bank called and said there was suspicious activity on her card, which she brushed off so she knows what it is. He looks like an older man, though he claims to be 25 (daughter is 22). After he called her at 3 am while she was living here, I told her if she was going to continue this stupid relationship with someone she doesn't know and wake me up in the middle of the night, then she can move out. He (from what others have told me) basically threatened to "break up" with her if she didn't leave, so she moved in with my mom. All her co-workers are suspicious of this guy and I certainly don't like what's going on. She refuses to date boys here because of this loser. Found out today my ex is supporting her and allowing this person to stay with him in Sept, despite my warnings. Am I supposed to sit back and let my daughter get taken advantage of?

It's very tough to watch our adult children make their own mistakes and sit by and watch it happen.
I know it's hard to bite your tongue and watch your child make mistakes, but that's exactly what you have to do - as itwinflame said, you will just push her further away.
Meeting this guy on her turf under her father's eye may be the best thing. She is an adult. Once you let go it becomes her responsibility to take care of herself and make her own decisions. If I were you I would apologize and support her. That way she can't do the opposite of what you want (maybe part of the desire to see this guy?) If this guy is truly using her then hopefully it will be obvious to her when he is here.
<<Am I supposed to sit back and let my daughter get taken advantage of? >>
In a word, yes.