silver, if two people come together at the wrong time in the wrong circumstance, the harder they try to make a relationship work, the further they will break it. Sometimes people just have to "fix" themselves first in order to make their relationships fall into place. Someone who has already been a close friend is a good prospect for love. But I do not think, under any circumstances, you should attempt to force, persuade, or cajole him to come back to you. Let him do his own thing - you may think he's doing it for himself but he's also doing it for the possibility of having a relationship with you. If you sabotage that, your chances will be less.
If your connection is strong, you will find one another again romantically. I hope that by "I took care of financial matters" you didn't simply bail him out by giving him money - this is one of the best ways to make a man feel like a boy. I understand as though you feel there is a piece of you missing (this is described in the book Getting The Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, it would be a good read for you), but you are not incomplete without him, what you're feeling is a reaction to having the person who gives you comfort and the FEELING of "wholeness" not be with you anymore.
What you're feeling now I imagine is a sense of panic and desperation. That's okay. It's going to be hard but you have to convince yourself that whatever happens is for the best, and that he may be back when he does some work on himself to feel more like an adult who can stand on his own two feet.
This is one of the least hopeless "lost the one" situations I've seen so far, he obviously cares for you. Good luck.
If you have really thought about suicide you need to seek help asap. It is hard when you have looked forward to something for so long only to end up being disappointed by it. But this isn't the end of the world. It does seem like you should give him a little bit of time. I know it is hard, but it is the best thing to do. Please keep posting here if you need anything.
Thank you everyone for your words. I didn't expect this much from a simple post, but you've all really helped to lift my spirits. I'm going to keep striving to do the best I can and hopefully when he's come to a point in his life when he can see clearly, maybe we'll be able to get back together. If not, I'll just keep my chin up and keep looking for the person whom I can be happy with.
silver, if two people come together at the wrong time in the wrong circumstance, the harder they try to make a relationship work, the further they will break it. Sometimes people just have to "fix" themselves first in order to make their relationships fall into place. Someone who has already been a close friend is a good prospect for love. But I do not think, under any circumstances, you should attempt to force, persuade, or cajole him to come back to you. Let him do his own thing - you may think he's doing it for himself but he's also doing it for the possibility of having a relationship with you. If you sabotage that, your chances will be less.
If your connection is strong, you will find one another again romantically. I hope that by "I took care of financial matters" you didn't simply bail him out by giving him money - this is one of the best ways to make a man feel like a boy. I understand as though you feel there is a piece of you missing (this is described in the book Getting The Love You Want by Harville Hendrix, it would be a good read for you), but you are not incomplete without him, what you're feeling is a reaction to having the person who gives you comfort and the FEELING of "wholeness" not be with you anymore.
What you're feeling now I imagine is a sense of panic and desperation. That's okay. It's going to be hard but you have to convince yourself that whatever happens is for the best, and that he may be back when he does some work on himself to feel more like an adult who can stand on his own two feet.
This is one of the least hopeless "lost the one" situations I've seen so far, he obviously cares for you. Good luck.
welcome to the board silvergodyouko,
If you have really thought about suicide you need to seek help asap. It is hard when you have looked forward to something for so long only to end up being disappointed by it. But this isn't the end of the world. It does seem like you should give him a little bit of time. I know it is hard, but it is the best thing to do. Please keep posting here if you need anything.
glitter-graphics.com
glitter-graphics.com
Welcome to the board silvergodyouko,
You've been given good advice. I know it's not what you want to hear.
So he broke off with you because he felt as though he was taking advantage of you in some way?
If he were "the one" the two of you would be together.
Thank you everyone for your words. I didn't expect this much from a simple post, but you've all really helped to lift my spirits. I'm going to keep striving to do the best I can and hopefully when he's come to a point in his life when he can see clearly, maybe we'll be able to get back together. If not, I'll just keep my chin up and keep looking for the person whom I can be happy with.
I can't express my gratitude enough.
Edited 8/22/2009 2:38 am ET by silvergodyouko