Depressed want to feel loved
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Depressed want to feel loved
| Fri, 08-13-2004 - 11:34pm |
I am 22 and married. I was married once before but it didnt work out. I had a child with the first marriage then we divorced. When I met my husband that I have now he seemed like the perfect person. He loved my child, loved me and done everything in the world for me. Then not too long after we got married I got pregnant and when his child was born he really didnt care for my child to much anymore nor did he me either. Now we have been married almost 3 years I am in nursing school trying to make our life better and all he does is put me down gripes about everything. Will not tell me that he loves me nor show any affection to me unless he decides that he wants some in bed. That is the only attention that I get. I never want to because I just feel like I am being used. All I do is take care of the kids go to school, clean house. He does what he wants when he wants and goes where he wants to go and what he does is none of my business. I know he is not cheating on me because I always find out where he goes. I am just tired of feeling so unhappy. All I ever wanted to be is to be loved. Someone to be there for me and to respect me for who I am and not cuss me all the time and tell me I am stupid or I am a stupid bitch. I do everything to try to make him happy but nothing ever works. I really need some advice or help so please help

First of all....you are a young woman and you have grown up very fast, with the fact that you are in a second marriage and you have children. You are going to nursing school! which I highly commend you on that! That tells me that you want more out of life and you are determined to make something of yourself and a future. Do not be depressed! you want to feel loved and YES! you deserve it, but obviously he is not the one to give you what you need. I got married young and was married to my high school sweetheart for 8 long years. We did not have children however. We got divorced when I turned 30 and I had to start all over again. Then I met someone else and was engaged to be married, that was a dissaster! I am a very affectionate person, who needs alot of attention and wants to be loved! but sometimes people like us; that are sweet and goodhearted, get taken advantage off. Also, we feel lonely and unwanted if we find ourselfs alone without a mate. The truth is; you really don't need anyone! At least you have yourself and your children. I just have me and thats it. I started a new career last year and just graduated as a Surgical Tech. Now my goal is to go for nursing. I am unemployed, and looking for work. Its not easy! I have a boyfriend, but its been bumpy and I am tired of going through relationship after relationship. I always ask outloud "when am I going to find someone who really loves me?" Do not put up with being put down by him and being disrespected, thats uncalled for and men seem to do that when they feel threatend in some way. It makes them feel more superior. That Machismo crap doesn't cut it! You might love the person, but it does not mean that you have to stay in that relationship and put up with the abuse. Remember that you and your children should come first! Maybe the best thing for you is to split and start over. You should not have to bend over backwards to do everything to please a person that obviously is not going to be pleased no matter what you do! If I were you (and this is just my opinion) I would split, take my kids, start over, finish school and get financially established and have a new life. Find yourself and your happiness......worry about being loved later, it will come when its meant to be. Don't be depressed! you are loved, your children love you and there is nothing more precious than that! Pick up your chin and be strong girl! You got it in you to do the right thing! I hope that my advise and opinion helps you some. Good luck and feel free to write me if ya like. Take care!