the difficult choice

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2007
the difficult choice
3
Sun, 11-11-2007 - 5:58am
I'm confused and don't know what to do?

The story is like this, I have a job, and on this job I'm teaching people how to learn and play a sport I'm like a coach. So I play with important people. This past weeks, one of the clients brought a girl she is 2-3 years younger then me and I began teaching her. So she is very cute, we even went on some dates together, I didn't want to make a relationship with her. So we met like friends. Then it became serious, and on one of the dates we kissed, (we didn't have sex) so after that I had some feelings for her.

After 2 weeks of seeing her, that person told me, that she wants that me and that girl to stay just best friends for some reasons: she doesn't want that I lose my clients after breaking up with her, and my reputation can be broken. Because after that girl came to me, I had a lot of important people who came at my lessons, and my financial position became better.

But I like a lot that girl, and I don't know what to do, because she is only 20 and I know very well after a break up nobody becomes friends... (it's very rare)

please help me with this situation thank you

P.Sorry for my english, I made my best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-1999
Sun, 11-11-2007 - 2:53pm
If you break up with her, trying to remain friends with her is not going to keep her from feeling hurt or possibly being angry. In the future, you might want to consider a policy of not going on any dates with any clients so you do not end up in this situation again. Since you are already seeing this girl, I don't think it will help to end things now. My only advice is to keep taking things slow. Don't let the relationship get serious any faster than it has to. That way if the relationship does end it will be last difficult. If you do find you ever need to break up with her, do it respectfully, the way you would want somebody to break-up with you. That way she shouldn't have a reason to tell anybody bad things about you. Hopefully, she is not the type of person who will go around spreading nasty rumors if the relationships ends when you did nothing wrong. If you have time to work with your clients, and you show them you are good at your job, they will probably judge your ability on that rather than on rumors anyways. And who knows? Maybe you and her will end up being together for a very long time, and this won't even be an issue.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 11-11-2007 - 3:42pm

Welcome to the board hameleon89,


Consider this: On Being Friends...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-11-2007
Sun, 11-11-2007 - 6:55pm
thanks a lot:) i even didn't expect to have such a answer. I had this idea in mind, but you cleared me up)