Do I have to tell my husband EVERYTHING?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-01-2007
Do I have to tell my husband EVERYTHING?
Sat, 11-05-2011 - 9:24pm

I've been married now for 13 years and our marriage has slowly deteriorating.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Mon, 11-07-2011 - 11:06am

When I read the sentence about you saying "nothing" when he asks you what you're getting out of the cabinet, I thought, well, that's stupid. Why would she take nothing out of a cabinet, why can't she just say she's gettin a box of rice? That isn't difficult.

Then I went on to read the rest, and I realize you are tired of having to answer for every single step you take in your life.

I would not be able to live with a man like this. I hope you don't have children with this guy. If you really want things to work, I would tell him that you're not happy with the way you communicate as a couple and you want to try marriage counseling in order to try to come to a compromise where he doesn't think you're being secretive, and you don't feel like you're being micromanaged.

I will say that it probably not work. Your husband needs individual counseling in order to overcome his instinct to control you in order to avoid feeling insecure. But at least marriage counseling MAY open the door to that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Mon, 11-07-2011 - 11:07am

Maybe he "didn't used to be" but he IS now.......and there's a reason.

Avatar for khatru1
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2004
Mon, 11-07-2011 - 11:40am

I was going to say he was just being annoying until I read about the "test". Thats just psycho!

At first one might think, whats the big deal, just tell him what you are getting out of the cupboard,etc. I know where she is coming from. I have experienced the same thing. Its the idea that you get asked constantly what you are doing, what are you getting, etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Mon, 11-07-2011 - 12:06pm

wow; I didnt want to use that word but since you have yes

I think what the guy does is def. psycho.. and to be honest I doubt any type of therapy will work on him.

Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
Tue, 11-08-2011 - 12:24am