Does he love me or not?
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| Wed, 03-03-2004 - 1:12pm |
I've told him that I love him, but he hasn't said he loves me. He's said "I care about you more than I want to admit" but he also says he doesn't know how he feels. He's told me he cares about me "a lot." I care about him more than I've ever cared about anyone else. We're best friends and the thought that he doesn't love me, and that I could lose my best friend breaks my heart. I'm trying to be objective, but I really think he does love me and isn't ready to say it, but then I second guess myself.
But at the same time, I need to know whether or not he does love me, or if I'm just setting myself up for a bigger heartbreak. He says he feels "broken" inside, and I'm so confused about whether he loves me and is afraid to say, or if he doesn't.
Any advice would be appreciated

Reading material to consider:
Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman
Men Are Like Waffles - Women Are Like Spaghetti, Bill & Pam Farrel
A Couple's Guide to Communication, John Mordechai Gottman
Carrie
Good Luck!
Your boyfriend is, as itwinflame said, hiding behind this 'I've been hurt'. Okay, so his fiancee cheated on him, but that was years ago. The fact that he cannot get past this speaks volumes about him. I would have a very open and honest discussion about what you need from him in order for this relatioship to continue. And if you can't state your needs for fear of his 'feelings' then you should really think about what kind of relationship you have if you cannot be entirely honest.
It's alright to be scared, but it's not alright for your fear to paralyze you and stop you from living your life fully. Do you really want to be with somebody long term that is unable to get past something that happened so many years ago?
Coolas