does he want me back??

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2004
does he want me back??
1
Thu, 04-29-2004 - 8:21pm
My ex-boyfriend and I have been emailing back and forth. He invited me over his house a few weeks ago, but, i am transfering between colleges right now and i just got a job. He's 21 and I am 19. Ok, last time he emailed me he said that he wants to invite me over again. Ok, my mom doesn't like him for reasons i don't understand. I wish she would just say that I am 19 and that it's my life, therefore allowing me to make my own decisions. I mean, the only thing that's important is that I love him right?? Should I tell her that I want him back? Do you think he wants me back? She found out before that I was emailing him and that I want him back....she said that I was "lowering myself to him". Isn't that really snobby?? See, my parents make, well, I won't say we're rich, but, put it this way....they make good money. My ex's parents are a bit different, but, the way I see it, just because our families are different, love can still conquer over it right? Love Conquers All!! Right?? Something happened to him between the time that we broke up and now. Besides, he's going to college to be a lawyer, who cares how much money he has now......heheh. Ok, seriously now...do you think maybe he thought about us breaking up, and how it was a bad move, and that maybe we can start over again?? I really wish my mother would just accept my feelings for him, I wish I could see him again, and that we could just get back together. Sorry this is soooo long...hehe. I have alot on my mind!

blondebeauty03

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Thu, 04-29-2004 - 9:22pm
Ah, this is from an online friend:

1) Love doesn’t conquer all. If it did, none of us would be here.

2) Love is never the problem. It is making everything else work with someone you just happen to love. If everything else doesn’t work, the love won’t make a difference. Conversely, if everything else is terrific but you DON’T love the person, it still won’t work. Compatibility and comfort are not the same as love.

3) Some things are irreparable. You can not unring the bell. Things will never be back the way they were; you need to look forward and imagine/plan/work towards the future factoring this situation in - honestly, as it is and not as you would like it. Think of it as a porcelain teapot that you dropped: even if you are lucky enough to find all those tiny pieces then doubly lucky enough to put it all back together again, you will NEVER be able to make tea in that pot again because it will leak or come unglued.

4)I reiterate the 50/50 rule. Each person in the relationship is only 50% responsible. You can not cover his 50% by yourself. If he is not up for it, then there is nothing you can do.

Your mom may have a point, but you won't see it because you don't really want to see it.

If he hasn't said he wants to get back together, don't read anything into his emails.

Sorry you have to go through this.


Edited 4/29/2004 9:23 pm ET ET by itwinflame


Carrie