Don't know what to do
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Don't know what to do
| Fri, 04-06-2007 - 7:14pm |
My 17 year old stepson suffered a gun shot wound in the neck approximately 10 months ago he also suffered a stroke. He has been out of the hospital for approximately 6 months. He's doing much better however he is now confined to a wheel chair. My problem is my stepson's mother and I really don't get along, so once my stepson left the hospitial I have not been to her home to visit at all. I have met my stepson and husband at the movies a few times but that's about it. My husband goes over to see his son at least 5 days per week. Since my stepson has progressed great and is now able to go places, I have asked my husband to start bringing him to our home for visits. He has indicated he does not have everything he needs at our house to spend the night. I advised if he could not stay all night, just bring him for the day but my husband refuses. He has basically shut me out of everything since this whole thing happened and just won't communicate with me at all. I'm home just about every evening alone and I spend most weekends by myself. I'm not sure if I should just move on or what I should really do at this point since my husband is not willing to bring his son to our home. My husband and I hardly communicate at all. We do not talk through out the day we just stay in the same home and share a bed. Please help

I know you've spoken to him about bringing his son to your home, but have you spoken to him about how your marriage is drawing apart? That is an issue that should be resolved separately. You shouldn't threaten to leave if you're not sure you want to, but maybe if you mention that you've considered the possibility at times it will serve as a wake-up call to him that he needs to pay more attention to the marriage.
He could also be depressed because of his sons problems and withdrawing may be his way of coping with it. Have you tried to offer him emotional support, and to let him know you are there for him if he wants to talk or anything?
I think marriage counseling would be a good idea. I would try at least asking if he is willing to go. If he says no, you might want to still see one by yourself.