Driving me nuts! - revisited
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 05-10-2004 - 12:57pm |
Background: she's part of an amateur dance troupe. Doesn't get paid, volunteers her time to practice and perform. I am proud of her skill and involvement. What's my issue? The performance requires several costume changes. There isn't a proper dressing room or changing area for the men and women; they share a small backstage area in which they all must change.
I am NOT happy knowing that there are 1/2 dozen guys in this small area with my girlfriend when she is undressing. Yes, they are, too, but what men wear and what women wear is different as we all know. In addition, there is an all-women routine which in which the performers wear backless costumes. This requires removing their bras. This means the men, who are not performing, are standing backstage while the women are topless.
Some of you have said "Live with it". Others have a different point of view that the lack of privacy is unacceptable. We've talked about; she says no one is looking. I find that very hard to believe. How do I deal with this???

Pages
1. Deal with it (that would be my choice);
2. Ask her to give up doing something she enjoys and is good at (which she may not be willing to do); or
3. End the relationship.
Besides, not to stereotype, but it's more likely than not that at least *some* of the men are gay! Plus, there are ways to disrobe modestly even in front of other people (e.g., turning your back, putting a T-shirt over everything while you take off your bra, etc). So your assumption that she's giving everyone an eyeful (and that they care!) is a bit much, I think.
Sheri
I say the problem is yours and that the less you dwell on it, the better off you'll be.
As far as the reality of the situation goes, though, please do not let your mind run wild. I 've been backstage at those shindigs, and everyone is so stressed out, trying to get things together, their minds are on other things.
Its like, trying to think of having sex, and then needing to go to the bathroom at the same time. It just does not work.
Try to keep things in perspective. Man, you're life must be good if this is your main problem, and relationship wise, if this is the only issue you have, I think you've found yourself a wife!! WHOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Pages