Engaged and need HELP

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-15-2007
Engaged and need HELP
2
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 1:44pm
Hello All,
I am 19 and engaged to my bestfriend since 6th Grade. We have been dating for 3 years now. Engaged for a year. I have know him since 6th grade we have been bestfriends since then. We have been fighting alot lately. We have been fighting about everything. To make a very long story short. He has come to the conclusion that he is not happy with the relationship and would like me to move back in with my rents (parents). I want to work on the relationship because people search their whole lives trying to get what him and I have between us. I dont know what to do. I love him. I dont want to leave I want to work things out. But he does not. We wouldnt be breaking up but just moving apart from each other. We bothe are not that happy with each other right now but i feel like we can work this out. I have a very good relationship with his mother and we have spoken about this and she feels that he needs to grow up and we need some time apart but not breakign up. I really need another opinion. How can i get him to see where i am coming from and get him to try to work on this relationship?
PLEASE HELP. I AM TORN.
Thank you,
Tina
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2004
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 8:25pm
Tina, I may not be the best advice giver, as I am on this site for advice myself. But I have a few years on you, which helps even though you don't yet realize it. I think that if your guy wants you to move out, you should move out ASAP. It doesn't mean the end of things, but if you stay it might be over without a chance. My sister once had to move out on her husband before they married, and it allowed them the space to realize what they wanted...which was each other. I am a firm believer that if it is meant to be, it will work out even if in a future time.
Unfortunately, neither you nor his mother can convince him to see things your way, and trying to force him to will likely push him further away. You said that people search for what you two have their whole lives...the idea that you have something special together like that is normal in a relationship, and you will surely meet another person in your life that you feel that way about. Give it time, give it space, and let things go the way they will. You are young and should be having fun!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 04-15-2007 - 10:03pm

Welcome to the board tina13s,


I agree with the previous poster.