Entertainment For Man

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2007
Entertainment For Man
8
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 8:14pm
I am having a hard time right now in my relationship; I can’t seem to entertain my man anymore. It’s not impossible to do so, but he constantly seeks new things from me. I am more than happy to try new things, but I do not know what to do anymore. We used to dance at my house, go to the movies, go out to eat, to the park, stuff like that. He likes to go out more than stay in the house. What should I do? Come on and teach, tamper, and tell because we get along fine, but I’m slipping bad here. My man is getting bored with me so much faster and we’re arguing because I’m afraid that he finds me boring. Can’t have that! I am what you call the innocent, energetic type. Yet I really didn’t entertain much when I was in school, so I’m not that good at it. I’m open to suggestions please.
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 9:14pm

Your job in a relationship is not to provide constant entertainment for your man, or for anyone. You are not a wind up toy. Your job is to be yourself and to share yourself and your true interests and feelings with someone who loves, respects and values you. If the man you are with is restless and not satisfied that is "his" problem. It doesn't mean that there is something wrong with you, or missing in you. It can simply be that his needs for stimulation and constant excitement is making it hard for him to be in a relationship..(this would be with anyone). Don't take this personally. There are times when two people are simply

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-20-2007 - 9:39pm

I agree that it's not your "job" to entertain him, but there are things you both can do for the better good of the relationship. Perhaps you can try some things with a bit of a competitive edge to it. Maybe mini-golf, bocce ball or even a game of pool. Add in some fun & silly side-bets and who knows what can happen.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 8:56am
What does he do to try to entertain YOU? This shouldn't be one-sided.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 4:38pm

I agree with spice.man, and

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-20-2007
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 6:15pm

To spice.man and i_b_sandradee I thank you, I will try to be more competitive in my relationship by challenging him with things he would like and rid myself of this mindset that it is my job to jump through hoops for him.

As for geoteo, My man could shoot rubber bands at a pigeon to entertain me because one I enjoy his company and secondly I’m a lot easier to amuse than he is.

And to drshoshanna, I am not trying to be a toy to him and he doesn’t think of me that way either. He respects and values me like he’s supposed to, he just hates being bored and I can’t stand being the cause of it. Which is why I am merely asking for any suggestions now.

Thank you all!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 7:04pm

Hi cece,


Ah, this part: "he just hates being bored and I can’t stand being the cause of it."


Well, you are not responsible for his happiness or his boredom.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 7:10pm

"He respects and values me like he’s supposed to, he just hates being bored and I can’t stand being the cause of it. Which is why I am merely asking for any suggestions now."

If he hates being bored, he can come up with things for the two of you to do. I also find it 100% unrealistic to never be bored together. I love my husband with all my heart and some days off spent together are just boring because there is nothing to do, the weather is bad, one of us is tired etc.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Fri, 06-22-2007 - 7:01am

"As for geoteo, My man could shoot rubber bands at a pigeon to entertain me because one I enjoy his company and secondly I’m a lot easier to amuse than he is."

I'm not suggesting that you're causing problems by being easily bored, just that I think you're shouldering too much of the burden of the "entertainment" in your relationship. He could shoot rubber bands at a pigeon to entertain you, but does he?

My point is that both members of a relationship have a responsibility for keeping things lively. One day you say, "I'll bet I can beat you two games out of three at pool," and the next time he says, "Let's go to the State Fair this weekend"--each of you takes a turn coming up with things to do. If you are the only one making plans for the two of you, and if he is often telling you how bored he is, then both of you are making this aspect of your relationship too much your job.