feel more like friends

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2006
feel more like friends
8
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 8:35am

Let me preface this by saying that I love my husband more than anything.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Sat, 03-03-2012 - 10:36am

Sometimes when you come back to a post a couple of months later, you see things you missed the first time.

You talked to him and he's fine with the way things are?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-06-2007
Sat, 03-03-2012 - 2:33am

Is the sex thing the only issue? Do you still feel in love with him? A great book for you to read is "The 5 Love Languages". It's about exactly what you're going through. It explains how the spark fades away and what you're left with is making the conscious decision to love each other. We all speak one of the 5 love languages and sometimes we don't always speak the same one as our significant other. But that's okay! That's just what makes you an individual. But it is the conscious effort we put forth to learn what the other persons wants and needs are in order to make love last and to ignite the spark. Read the book, you'll feel a world better :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 11:00am

The amount of sex that people have varies w/ individuals--if a couple decides that once a week makes both of them happy, there's nothing wrong w/ their relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-24-2003
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 5:39am

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Fri, 01-06-2012 - 3:56am

Gal_jen, I'm wondering what's behind your question.

Is it that you are unsatisfied with your sex life?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 3:28pm

This sounds terribly unromatic but I've heard it works--schedule time for sex.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 1:35pm

I can only add to Undercovercrab's post by saying one IMPORTANT thing.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Thu, 01-05-2012 - 9:59am

I know it sounds like you can't afford counseling but there are many programs available to make counseling really affordable... I know someone who pays only $30/session through a program for licensed therapists who are looking to specialize, and are training for more specific degrees. You have been together six years and married for only one, things shouldn't go downhill so fast. Sometimes marriage does change people - They often feel like they have gotten to the "end game" and settle down without putting effort into the relationship anymore. I really think you should reconsider counseling, it can be affordable if you look into different options.