feel like we're going nowhere

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-15-2003
feel like we're going nowhere
2
Fri, 07-02-2004 - 3:36pm
I feel like my bf life is already so full there's no room for me. We've been together 5 months now. I feel kept at arm's length with him. I feel as if I'm with him, only when he doesn't have anything else to do (which I know sometimes is ridiculous). I feel his life is set, and that if it keeps going this way, there is no room for me in it. He's set with his hiking, of which I'm not really participating for a while as he's doing some more challenging stuff, and come winter he will be skiing most weekends which i do not and do not have a desire to do. I feel he'd rather read, spin music, than spend any time with me (again I know I'm being silly, but its how I feel). I don't really feel like I can go to him and talk. I understand its his desire to not push, pry or get to intense with me as he's done and as a result wrecked previous relationships, but in the process I don't really feel like this is going anywhere. I want it to, and I thought I could have the patience to take this slow, but I guess not. I'm not looking to rush things though don't get me wrong...I just want a little more time for us to be together to develop something more between us.

For example too I asked him to a friends party tonight, he wants to go on a solo moonlight hike...ok fine whatever...but then for 4th of July we may do something unless the weather cannot be passed up for him to go hiking. I see him maybe 2X a week (and btw we live a 15 minute drive from each other...we are 22 and 25)

I know he does want to get to know me, we had a talk that I felt like he really wasn't interested in me. Am I wrong to ask for more time together?

I don't feel like this is a relationship at all, more like casually dating someone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-02-2004 - 4:00pm
It is "just dating" and if you want a relationship - you need to date someone that wants a relationship - not just date someone who "wants to date".

Because that is all he wants to do.

Erin

quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Fri, 07-02-2004 - 6:03pm
You keep saying that you are being silly or rediculous yet you are describing facts, right? I think you two are very different. He is more introverted, has different hobbies than you and doesn't make you a priority. Do you really want *this* relationship to move forward or do you want *a* relationship to go forward?