Feeling isolated & reacting badly

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2007
Feeling isolated & reacting badly
2
Mon, 04-09-2007 - 10:24pm
Socially, my boyfriend & I are worlds apart. We are thirty-somethings and he loves parties, having alot friends around & club hopping. I'm not into the mass socialising & prefer movies, going out to dinner, & the occasional parties. We have tried each other's events. Other than this, everything else is fine. Almost 2 yrs together ,I love him & don't worry about his affections. I expected to do couple stuff. But there is always a mass of friends around. I don't mind company but not every time we go out. We have talked & argued about it. It's not an issue for him. It is 'We are out together'. End of story. I see his point. At first, I was a little put off but now when friends show up, which is always, I deflate. I feel abandoned. I hate my reaction. It's petty. I just want a mix of social scenes - us alone, us with friends, each of on on our own, etc. Should I just be grateful we are going out at all & other things work? I don't want us to grow apart, but I need to pick up my social life. Yes I dropped it waiting. Hence the question. I'd love to hear your comments.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Tue, 04-10-2007 - 11:31am

Welcome to the board cheybay,


I don't see why your bf can't make some sort of compromise with you on this issue. Relationships are about compromise. Sit him down and have a talk with him telling him how important this is to you and give him some suggestions for possible compromises. This should be able to get worked out. Good luck.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 04-10-2007 - 12:35pm

Hi cheybay,


Consider the book Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. I'm wondering if you are