Fiancee wants only one child
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Fiancee wants only one child
| Thu, 08-07-2008 - 1:16pm |
We discussed extensively when we first got together what we wanted.
| Thu, 08-07-2008 - 1:16pm |
We discussed extensively when we first got together what we wanted.
Welcome to the board nativeapril23,
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"We discussed extensively when we first got together what we wanted. Children and in multiple amounts had much enthusiasm from me and him." It changed after they had their first.
From the subject line, they are not married yet, but engaged.
<< I am guessing that he has a lot of negative influence and having the one child (he does have three others from previous relationships). >>
Previous relationships?
How much of a financial load is the child support for three other kids?
At the risk of sounding rude, I think that you should just "suck it up". He is the father of your child and if that is the ONLY problem that you have, than you are doing fine. "raising" a child is hard work, and he is honest enough to tell you that he thinks he has changed his mind about having 2, and yet he is leaving the door open for more than one.
I am a woman who has had 4 pregnancy losses in her life, one of which was at 6 months. I now am completely childless, and will never have children even though my plan was to have 2. All I can do is suck it up. Life doesn't always go as planned.
I think that to leave a relationship for the sole reason that he isn't enjoying being a father as much as you are enjoying being a mother is actually immature, although I can certainly understand your urge to have another. Life is hard and if it's not going to work you cannot throw your own temper tantrum (ie-leaving him to find another sperm donor) to get your way. The best thing to do in this situation is to love the child that you have, love your fiance, respect the commitment you are going to make with him and regret not having more children but realize that life doesn't always go the way we want. It's not fair to leave him and then desperately try to search out a man to father more children for you.