Brookita, of course he drew those lines intentionally.
His behavior would just be childish if it weren't also scary.
He sounds scary and it even seems as though he's sort of gaslighting you. You know he made the marks and while I understand him being annoyed at the mark you made ( 1" is not tiny), I can't imagine trying to deliver a message the way he did. I would personally run like hell.
Brookita, I just looked through a bit of your history on the boards.
I can tell you how to handle it!
Thank you for all of your kind advice and responses. Almost all of your responses were similar in that you all think he’s abusive and that I should leave. I am now looking into moving out. It is hard for me. We have been together for 3.5 years now and I do love him. I looked up signs and signals of an abuser and he does have some of them.
It is strange that a practicing Buddhist would be in a relationship with someone who displays such blinding rage. It sounds like you are right, you have a tendency for compassion and forgiveness. But you can be compassionate and forgiving without being in a relationship with someone who is very wrong for you (and he would be wrong for anyone... he has a lot of work to do on his soul before he can be able to be a healthy partner).
His ex-wife may be mentally unstable but knowing the person he is, and what he is capable of, I would say it's likely that he wasn't innocent in this altercation. People who exhibit the kind of raging behavior and intense anger as he does will always look for someone else to blame for "making me do it". Just as it was "your fault" for making him write you a nasty note on the duvet cover, I'm sure he has words of blame for his "crazy" ex. Well, you know for a fact that he is pretty crazy himself. It's not easy to get thrown in jail for absolutely nothing. How do you know he didn't physically hurt her? That's most likely what happened.
Moving out is the right decision. I am so glad you are seeing it now before he has a chance to gaslight you.