Freezer bags are for food, not relationships.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Freezer bags are for food, not relationships.
11
Thu, 12-08-2011 - 6:28pm

I understand that looking at beautiful objects, animals, people, plants, sunsets, foods, etc., is appealing to any human being.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 12-08-2011 - 8:21pm

I think there are different ways of noticing other people.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Thu, 12-08-2011 - 10:13pm
Thanks for your insight. I think that as I make more progress in accepting and embracing myself, the way other people look will have a minimal impact on my life. When women feel so insecure physically it totally sabotages our ability to see our important qualities. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 1:40am

You have been reading too many psych books!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-03-2009
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 7:12am
I look at beautiful men, women, animals, objects, all the time. I am secure enough to discuss other women's beauty with my H and he is secure enough to discuss other men's as well.

You say you are in your early twenties and I think that's pretty common around that age to feel insecure about who we are. So don't be too hard on yourself but it's good you are working on it.

Have you shared with your bf your insecurities ? I think you shouldnt be asking him what he's thinking or feeling when you know very well you won't be able to handle it. That's just pointless.

And I am wondering this, when you see an attractive woman walking by, do you turn around to watch your boyfriend's reaction ? That is just as pointless.

Let it go and let it be, your bf seems respectful and normal. If he follows women around with his eyes and undress them then I agree that's not cool but if it's just a look then let it go and don't spy to catch him red-handed.. Pointless behaviour that is only good to hurt your feelings.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 9:09am

HI corbiculae. You might want to check out the "Snooping And Jealousy" board as well since your problem would be right at home.

I am 28 and didn't overcome extreme irrational jealousy until around 22-23. Being a young adult comes with a lot of inherent

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 9:11pm

Hi Undercover Crab,

It's helpful to hear you share your experience; it lets me know that I am a human among humans.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 9:12pm

Thanks for your insight. I think that as I make more progress in accepting and embracing myself, the way other people look will have a minimal impact on my life. When women feel so insecure physically it totally sabotages our ability to see our important qualities. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 9:14pm

Thanks for all of your insight and supportive statements!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2011
Fri, 12-09-2011 - 9:20pm

Newlywed,

I agree that I should avoid engaging in behavior that I know will be self defeating, and it's helpful to hear you mention that you are comfortable enough to have discussions about beauty with your spouse. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Sat, 12-10-2011 - 12:11am

I read in your reply to someone else that your therapist has taught you not to be embarassed about your jealousy???

Did the therapist teach you that unfounded jealousy is more of your problem than embarassment about being jealous when there's nothing to be jealous of?

You are using hypotheses that are completely incorrect to base your jealousies on.

Pages