Girls from the past..

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Girls from the past..
4
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 6:51am
My boyfriend of one year has been getting phone calls from this B*TCH in the philipines. He says shes his "friend", and hes never had sex with her er whatever. But I do know that she sent him nude photos of herself, and put on a show over the webcam for him before he and I got together. He went over there last year I guess and met her, among others, and did god knows what with them. My question is; he says there "friends" and shes half a world away, and hes never done anything with her, so I shouldnt be "worried". But I still dont think its right that she calls him 5 times in 20 mins. He didnt answer, but he should tell her hes in a relationship now. Because, Im sorry this is going to sound bad, but her and all the other whores (literally) over there, only want some american man to marry them and bring em back to the US. Am I wrong for wanting him to tell her to back the freak off now, because hes with me?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 8:18am

Your BF thinks that just because him and her are "half a world away", that the reality of this isnt there. Unfortunatley, he is very wrong. What he did in the past, is just that- the past. In my eyes, it doesnt concern you and should have no bearing on what you feel. That doesnt always happen either. First thing is to let him know that his behavior is disrespectful and wont be tolerated. That it hurts you and if he wants to continue, he can do so with out you in his life. If he is mature, he will take it uopn himself to call her or fill her in on you the next time she tries to contact him.


Whether she gets the clue the first time or not...I dont know.


Good luck,


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2004
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 9:31am
Have you ever thought that maybe he is playing you both....

it is quite possible that he is dating her as well. He probably tells her that you are just a friend, and that he really loves her, and he still gets webcam performances and nude pics over the net and you don't know about it.

IF she is calling 5 times in 20 minutes, and he didn't answer or didn't try to talk to her, maybe she is calling b/c she knows her man is with another girl and is freaking out.

Him not answering makes him look guilty. If she was just a friend, he would have picked up the phone, said that he was busy with his girlfriend and told her that he would call her back later.

I would have him tell her on the phone (with you there next 2 him) that he is dating you. If he won't do it then he has something to hide and he is playing you both.


If he does tell her that you are this girl - then most people would say that is okay for him to have female friends even with his girl. I don't agree with that logic. I think people shouldnt stay friends with their exes.

as fas as him having not had sex with her, I don't believe that all. If she is willing to webcam stuff over the internet and send nude pics, then I am sure she did something with him when he went to visit. Like you said, if she is trying to get a man to bring her over to the US, don't you think she would be giving him sex or whatever else he wanted, when he went to visit her?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 3:49pm
I totally agree with batharine if they were just friends, she'd know about you and he's feel free to say, hey, I'm with my gf, I'll call you later or, hey, what's up, and keep it short. I think he likes the webcam thing, the nude pics and her attention and he can have both right now because you haven't left him.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-21-2003
Tue, 10-05-2004 - 7:09am
Thank you all so much for the advice and input. I totally agree. He should have answered if there wasnt anything to hide. He also says the reason he DOESNT answer is because "he just wants to blow em off" "he doesnt want to start trouble with them because they're nice people" and he just wants to ignore them (yea them.. theres more then one). God!!! Repeating what he says pisses me off all over again because I think its so stupid!! Hes so stupid for not realizing how stupid and F'd up that sounds!! The sad part is, and the part that pisses me off the most, is that he honestly doesnt even understand how F'd up what hes saying and doing is. GRRRR!! Idiot!! Well, we'll see what happens. I messege her on yahoo and tell her not to call and blah blah blah, and Im nice about it, right? She still calls, but never messeges me back. I tell her we live together and im sitting right there everytime his phone rings. Anyways. Thanks for agreeing with me!! For a minute, I thought I was being to possesive, and jealous when he blew it all off like it was normal.