He asked for more time............
Find a Conversation
| Mon, 05-21-2007 - 9:39pm |
Dear someone who care:
Here’s my situation: when we first started talking again I told myself not to let him in my heart, well to late.
When we got back together again he was every chicks dream and after 6 months something died in him, that spark he once had got blown out. He really doesn’t have long relationships with his girlfriends either, so far it’s been over a year for us and I feel he’s struggling with that. I have this hot boyfriend who works out daily and is really into himself, about how his apperance will affect him and he loves his family too and would someday make a great dad and husband. He has a big heart but it’s been hard to get to. My issue is he wont even touch me anyway shape or form whether it be emotional, physical, sexual, doesn’t know if he wants to be with me and I feel he could give a care less on how I feel at times, he doesn’t want to listen or have confertations, he says. And when times get tough or his life gets too busy, he puts the relationship on the back burner and comes back when he wants to, when its convient for him. We don’t work things out to gether,(like we should) he has to do it own his own, he says. And when it comes to being romantic, sexual or doing the things that turn me on, he doesn’t do them and he knows, but why? I don’t even really know what turns him on, I’ve asked? He used to be so into me and that’s what I’m hanging on to is the past, it was amazing. Now when he comes home from whatever I don’t get a hug, kiss, missed you or even really a “hi”, just a cold shoulder. I still get those butterflies when I’m with him like I had in the beginning. When I leave work I want nothing more than to see him. He used to be the most affectionate person, so into you and what’s going on in your world, talk and text on the phone all the time telling each other dirty thoughts or whatever, and by the way a great snuggler too. Now it’s like I don’t even exist at times, I feel like a burden and even his roommate at times also. I can hear the anger is his voice when he talks, I see the unhappiness on his face, the lack of desire he used to have. We both have told each other that we’re unhappy. He keeps telling me to give him time and I do. I am the kinda person who needs and wants attention, affection and wants to be loved and especially by him. I am a caring person with a big heart, a heart that wasn’t suppose to let him in. I lie next to him every night, except when he’s at the firestation, naked trying to get as close to him as I can and I can’t. I get nothing from him no touch ,no kiss, just snoring. He knows that I want him morning, noon and night and would do anything sexual for him or with him. He is everything that I want my husband to be and more but he has such a grudge against me or whoever that I don’t think he will ever get over of it. I am hurting, I am lonely, I am emotionally, physical and sexually upset and I am mad. Not only do I want him as my lover but as a friend too. I want to give him my love, show him the passion I have for him and want so badly to make love to him and get the same in return. I want that closeness feeling that a relationship is suppose to have but is it to late, is time gonna be what it takes? So dear someone who cares, would you hang on to him and give him the time he needs to see if he comes around again or just let him go?

are you afraid of being alone?
If you've shared a year together and only 6 months was what made you happy. I think it is time to say goodbye. He hasn't done anything to give you what you need. I'd say stick it out, but it looks like you've told him point blank what you need.
Is is worth it to stick by someone who will not love you the same way? Only you can answer this. I believe the answer is no.
Relationships are tough and even more tough when two people aren't on the same wavelength. Basically, he will never be what you want. If you are happy w/ how he is to you, then its a good relationship for you. But, I don't think you are happy.
If you stay because hes "beautiful" on the outside and you get butterflies... if will change you in ways you dont want to imagine. Meaning you will learn to "love" like he does and never have a fulfilling relationship. Not something you want.
I'm sorry. I had a very slight case of this from my boyfriend and we almost broke up... but hes made an effort to change himself for the better of him and for us.... But, I know the feeling of how its making you feel.
Good luck.
Welcome to the board cndygirl,
Have you talked to him about all of this and how it makes you feel? Have you asked him what is going go? It is obvious something is going on. Does he seem depressed?
If the relationship is going to be fixed, he has to acknowledge what is wrong and take steps together fixing it. Right now it seems as if he is running from or ignoring whatever is bothering him.
glitter-graphics.com
glitter-graphics.com