he cheated, and i forgave him, now what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2004
he cheated, and i forgave him, now what?
3
Tue, 03-02-2004 - 5:36pm
I am 19, he is 21. I just found out he made-out with his best friend. He said it only happened once and that he only sees her as a friend. But it's so hard for me to trust him and not think he is out there cheating on me. I love him so much, i don't wanna brake up. I'm giving him only 1 chance to change, is this a good idea, or am i stupid? and how do i trust him again? Thanks for the help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Tue, 03-02-2004 - 5:43pm
You've been betrayed by your bf and it's not something that you will get over and forget easily. Most couples, married or not, cannot rebuild trust without third party help, as in couples counseling.

Reading material to consider:

Straight Talk About Betrayal: A Self-Help Guide for Couples by Donna R. Bellafiore


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Wed, 03-03-2004 - 7:00am
i agree with itwinflame. you can't just "get over this" and you are both going to have to do alot of work if this is going to work out. good luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2004
Wed, 03-03-2004 - 8:56am
When you get back together with someone who has done something like that behind your back, you will either have to not mention it again and try to get back to where you were or accept that you will probably never be completely trusting and happy with him, especially if you know he is capable of tossing thoughts of you to the side for one night if he feels like it. Hopefully detective work to make sure he's remaining faithful again won't overrun your life. Only you know yourself and if getting back together is good for you.

 

Tiffany