Is he cheating or is it over?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2007
Is he cheating or is it over?
2
Mon, 05-28-2007 - 12:41am

I have been married for 3.5 years and me and my husband dated for 3 years before getting married. So all together it has been almost 7 years. Lately when I ask him for help he tells me things like you have the kids to help you (I have 3 kids from a previous relationship which lasted 8 years and 1 kid with him) or your the Bombmom you can do it by yourself. That is the nickname he gave me. I pay all the bills I cook, clean, take care of house and pets and anything else that has to do with home. He works but when I ask for money he tells me that he has none or he wants to know what he is going to get out of it.

I think he is cheating when his cell phone rings he goes outside to talk. But he comes straight home after work. I think he wants out but doesn't want to leave because he knows he won't find another woman who will let him sleep in her bed without paying any bills helping raise the kids or helping clean the house, yard, etc.

I'm ready to walk but I don't want to throw my marriage away because he is lazy. Please help tell me what to do, should I tell him to leave (I do everything by myself anyways) or should I try to figure out why he thinks he doesn't have to help me.

As of now it has been a week since the last time he talked to me, because I asked for his help to clean our front yard.

Help!!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 05-28-2007 - 4:42pm

Welcome to the board evotdraw,


The fact that he's taking calls on his cell outside, is not a good sign.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2005
Mon, 05-28-2007 - 11:55pm

Only you know if your marriage is over but I would say based on your servitude status without financial compensation, assistance or respect you don't have much to work with. I think your reasoning is flawed as to why he stays. He can always find another woman to disrespect. Many men choose to stay in unhappy relationships and cheat rather than deal with the problem or move on.

There appears to be a lack of commitment (or love) on both parts. You may want to try counseling to see if you can open the lines of communication.