Is he just humoring me?
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Is he just humoring me?
| Wed, 02-04-2004 - 3:12pm |
Why would a guy ask a girl out and not follow through with plans? Is he just humoring me? No date has been set to go out yet and it has been two and half weeks since. Should I let it go or should i call him and ask him 'what about our plans to hang out'? I've been told to let the guy pursue the girl. If I call, does that mean I'm pursuing him, pressuring him to go out with me even though he is the one who offered to hang out?
I've known this guy for a few months now and we met through a mutual friend. Our friend was trying to set us up. We both weren't ready for a relationship when we both met. We both just got out of a relationship at the time. We've become some what like casual friends since then. We mainly communicate through e-mail. We've hung out a couple of times when we first met and I've bumped into him on a couple of occasions at mutual friends' gatherings after that. He has also asked me out a month ago but I couldn't go out with him because I was busy on the day he has asked me out. I turned him down without giving an alternate and was not even thinking of the consequence of that since I was nervous when he called.
I have been ready quite sometime now to start a relationship. If he asked me out, does that me he is ready too? But he didn't follow through with this one. I've developed a crush on him since we met and I think he knows it too which could be the reason why he asked me out. Any insight would be much appreciated.
I've known this guy for a few months now and we met through a mutual friend. Our friend was trying to set us up. We both weren't ready for a relationship when we both met. We both just got out of a relationship at the time. We've become some what like casual friends since then. We mainly communicate through e-mail. We've hung out a couple of times when we first met and I've bumped into him on a couple of occasions at mutual friends' gatherings after that. He has also asked me out a month ago but I couldn't go out with him because I was busy on the day he has asked me out. I turned him down without giving an alternate and was not even thinking of the consequence of that since I was nervous when he called.
I have been ready quite sometime now to start a relationship. If he asked me out, does that me he is ready too? But he didn't follow through with this one. I've developed a crush on him since we met and I think he knows it too which could be the reason why he asked me out. Any insight would be much appreciated.

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Good luck - try not to stress out about all this - this should be the fun part.
Peace - Pebbles
If you thanked him while you were on the date (which I hope you did!), then a "thank you email" is unnecessary and overkill.
Some guys find it very hard being turned down - it's hard for them to get up the courage to ask again. Since he already asked you out once, and you couldn't make it, I think it's fine for you to be the one to ask him out this time. This will let him know directly that you want to get together. Do it in a light way, with nol mention made of the fact that he said he'd call and didn't. He just might be nervous about this. Don't bring the past up, just go forward. It's worth a try, as he once did ask you out. See what happens. If he goes for it, that's great. If not, then I'd let things alone, without dwelling too much upon
It's A New Day With Dr Shoshanna - Wed. 2-3 EST.
I think it is time to give up. This has been going on for quite a while. It shouldn't be this difficult and draining for two people who want to see each other to get together. He obviously isn't ready or interested as you are.
Set your sights elsewhere. I bet there is another guy or a girlfriend of yours more deserving of going to the event with you.
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