He prefers the spare room!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2003
He prefers the spare room!!
1
Mon, 06-07-2004 - 4:26pm
Sounds daft or wot? but me and my boyfriend (we are both 32) of three years (on and off) are having a few problems, he`s a strange guy whos very bad at expressing his true feelings etc, recently we went to london which should of being a lovely romantic weekend instead we had an aurgument and he left me stranded and went home. since then things haven`t being the same he`s moved in the spare room saying he can sleep better there but besides that he no long likes any physical contact at all, it`s almost as though he`s tring to punish me, when i say this can`t go on like this we need to sort it out he just says he doesn`t give a f**k! not very constructive, I`ve tried the threats of breaking up or I`ll try being extra nice, nothing seems to get through, we had a similar problem last year it took 4 bloody months for him to return to normal, I don`t think I have the patients for that, what approach should I take, as I don`t really want him to leave.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 3:04pm
So he's punishing you and he's done this before.... and he doesn't care, because he wants to make a point and make you emotionally suffer, hey, isn't that emotional abusive.

And you want to stay with him, but you don't want to wait him out. So here's what you say "Is this how your life is going to be from here on out? If so, I still love you, but I can't live this way. So I'm going to counseling to help me decide if I'm worth more than this. Would you like to go with me?" His answer will be your answer. Follow through with going to counseling so you can see your relationship for what it is.


Carrie