He thinks I cheated

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2008
He thinks I cheated
17
Tue, 03-18-2008 - 9:24pm

Well my bofriend of seven months broke up with me a month ago saying he knows I cheated on him three months ago.


Long story short!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Tue, 03-18-2008 - 9:49pm

Your relationship wasn't as great as you think if he could discard you over something so unfounded.

I think you really need to start taking the advice you're getting rather than for waiting for one person to have the answer you're looking for.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2008
Tue, 03-18-2008 - 9:55pm

Thanks for posting.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 03-18-2008 - 11:26pm

Welcome to the board winnmp,


So he's talking himself into his insecurities instead of believing you?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 1:15am

I also think you should listen to the advice you've been getting to stay away from him. There is something very wrong with a man who invents scenarios where his partner cheats on him, and then convinces himself that they're true. He is not mentally or emotionally stable.


If you move forward with him , this will happen again - make no mistake about that. He will never trust you, and you will always be jumping through hoops trying to prove a negative. That can't be done. I'm sorry I'm not giving you the answer you want to hear, but this man has a serious problem. Plain old garden variety insecurity does not make people dump their partners over a perceived wrongdoing when they have

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 7:20am
"moving forward" with him would absolutely require that he change his mind about that night, because it's the difference between trusting your word and being irrational. No relationship lasts without trust.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2008
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 9:19am

Within the last three months, he has tried to change his "ways".

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 10:29am

Don't look at this as a single episode, look at the pattern of his relationships, and the pattern of his behavior with you.


Has he usually broken up with his girl friends after a few months?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2008
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 4:03pm

That's the thing, He doesn't do any of those things!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 03-19-2008 - 4:29pm

You've only been dating him for 7 months. The kind of control issues that you are beginning to see don't usually happen early in the relationship because controllers would never be able to hook a woman if they did that early on. They wait until you are very attached to them and then the controlling behavior begins. You also mentioned that it kills him that you work with mostly men. This is not normal. His unreasonable jealousy and insecurity are not proof that he loves you, it's just proof that's he's got a serious problem.


He is still punishing you for something you did not do, and for which he has no evidence. He's got you right where he wants you. Once he deems you've suffered enough, he'll agree to see you and you'll be so careful not to upset him again. That's why you are so confused about his behavior. He is manipulating you over something he invented! I have no doubt that he will want you back, but

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2007
Thu, 03-20-2008 - 4:39am

Why should you working in a place where there are mostly men make him feel insecure???


Sounds like a really bad relationship to me.

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