Is he tired of me or what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2004
Is he tired of me or what?
2
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 12:00am
I'm a 20 year old living with my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years, and a daughter who is 16 months old. Before i began working, everything was great! He would cook, clean, and was more romantic than any guy I had been with before. Then when the stress of supporting a girlfriend and child was becoming too much for him, we both decided that it would be good for me to work part-time to bring in extra income. Well, I started working 3 months ago, and ever since he acts like he has no interest in speaking to me. He has always been very quiet guy, but could talk to me for hours on end. Now he only opens his mouth to tell me the baby needs a diaper change or to ask when I'm going to make him something to eat. Every time the guys from work call and need a ride somewhere or want him to go out with them, he jumps in the car and takes off. But when I need milk or laundry detergent he throws a fit about how he's tired from work. So I have to run to the store and take the baby with me because he says he needs a nap and can't possibly watch her. He once told me that he works harder than I do so I should be the one cooking and cleaning and taking care of our daughter. He complains that he doesn't like the guys at work very much and yet he's reluctant to say no when they need something. When i need somthing he says I can afford it myself and don't need his money. He snaps at me anytime I mention how insensitive he is acting.How could me having a job cause him to act so indifferent to me all the time?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2004
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 1:57am
Sorry, but it sounds like he is immature and had fun playing house until it got "heavy" and now he's running away from the responsibility. This is the reason women want a ring on their finger and a wedding. If you move in with a boyfriend you might as well expect this treatment. He never made a real commitment to you. You were easy. Now he wants someone else that's easy. He views the baby as YOUR problem. You have learned the hard way what sayings like "why buy the cow if you can have the milk for free" means. Your in for a tough time girl. From this day on you had better make the decision that as much as you may care for someone, they will have to prove them self to you by planning a real future. It's easy to fall for someone. It's work to find out their character. What are their religious beliefs? How do they view saving money or spending money? Do they like to wear womans underwear when alone? Are they into drugs? Do they love their work and do they show up? All these things will have to do with how your life will be with them. Did they love their mom? That's a big one. A man that had no respect for his mother or saw her cheat on dad will be a bad choice as he'll treat you badly. It's a shame that there is a child that will someday say "who's my daddy and why did you make him go away?" What ever you do DO NOT let yourself get pregnant again by a boyfriend. Not unless you want to get used to a life on welfare living in a dirty motel room. I wish you luck and wisdom.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Mon, 10-04-2004 - 8:07am
You took the words out of my mouth. Girls, listen up... its

education

financial stability and independence

marriage

babies

In that order.