Is he using to have a sex with me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
Is he using to have a sex with me?
2
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 3:19am
Hello,

I met a man through online-dating 4 months ago. We communicated thorugh e-mail and phone a little bit then we met.

He works all the time. He gets home from work late, goes on out-of-town trips often. Even if I call his cell, it always goes to answering machine. He emphasizes about sex all the time when we talk and meet. We meet at least once a month, so I want to talk and do something with him.

First his thought about us was just play around because he is workaholic(I am sure he is commitment-phobia too), so he can't give me lots of time to spend and "I love you" and "I miss you" were very BIG words for him that time. Our communication pattern was I call first then he called me back. (I was so tired of it) It seems me a little bit change so far because last few times, he gave me unexpected calls,(Last one he gave me a call when he got home from out-of-town business trip.) he started saying to me "I missed you","I was thinking about you" and held my hands etc.

I have doubt that all these things he says and does to me because he just wants to have sex with me? Should I trust that his words come from his true feelings? My friend told to me that "If he is not interested to you, he won't call you back , you need give him more time!

Please help me!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 7:25am
yokko...

It's obvious that you're not completely happy about this man's habits nor how he seems to emphasize SEX more than anything else.

So why are you putting yourself through this garbage? Is this man the ONLY PERSON who has ever paid attention to you? (Pianoguy doubts it)

To be blunt...you are probably satisfying his need to communicate. Knowing that you'll accept his terms, talk about what he wants to talk about and the fact that YOU will listen to whatever he has to say...why should he change the routine?

YOU can...if you really want to!

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Sat, 07-24-2004 - 11:55am
This sounds pretty suspicious. Calls always going to voicemail, out of town trips and workaholic OR is he married? Have you ever seen where he lives? Do you have his home phone number? Do you always see him on his terms? HAve you met his friends and family?