He wont pay for his fair share of bills.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2003
He wont pay for his fair share of bills.
3
Mon, 06-07-2004 - 5:04pm
Yes I know I`ve already moaned about the poor guy in a different discussion bless him, but this is a seperate issue to the bedroom, basically we live together but the house belongs to me, he`s on twice my salary and to be honest he could eaisly pay the mortgage bills etc on his own if he wanted, recently my lodger moved out meaning we would be slightly worse off, instead of him agreeing to help split the difference I`m having to work too jobs every day of the week to make ends meet.

I asked him how much he picked up each month so we could work out a budget planner like I do, he refused to say but I found a pay slip and was going purple with rage when I realised he could easily afford it, I know he`s trying to set up his own business which means investment etc but still to stand back and to just give me the bare minimum of money and watch me struggle hurts, when I confront him he just says It`s my morgage my problem he`s not interested, he can be very generous somtimes , buy me things but this won`t pay the bills how do I get it through to him without sounding like I`m trying to screw him for money?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 2:58pm
I think you know the answer to your questions. Have you seen the movie 'The Joy Luck Club'?

My best to you.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 5:31pm
The answer to your problem IMO is simple. Not easy, but simple. You are not in an equal partnership. Your bf is selfish and doesn't care about having an equal partnership with you. His actions have CLEARLY told you this. If an equal partnership, and a partner who cares and shares is what you're looking for, then kick him out of your house and keep looking. You are not going to change this sow's ear into a silk purse, so stop wasting your breath. If you are not happy with him as a partner then DO something about it (ie, make wiser choices in your life that will bring you closer to your goals and to what you want and need). Keep looking to find a person who is on the same page as you, not only in the area of finances but also in the general area of what type of relationship you want for yourself. Hopefully this is not it, and hopefully you will have the strength and wisdom to do what's necessary for yourself. If not, then be prepared to put up with this crap for a good long time. Good luck.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 9:40pm
Just kick him the F out. This is just rediculous. My ex husband acted like that too. My money paid for all the necessities, and he refused to help out. He also did not beleive in child support, which I used to yank his rights away from his child.

I speak from the heart. Use your rage, and kick him out!!