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| Sat, 09-25-2004 - 6:54pm |
I had a relationship with a man 10 years ago, it was very complicated at the time - I had a bf but was to scared to break up with him to be with this other person. When I finally did break up with my bf the other person had moved on. He had waited for me for a year but we had still kept in touch - and both still had strong feelings for each other. (we feel that we are soul mates)There were times in between that he would call me to see how i was but then I would be in another relationship so he wouldn't say the real reason he called because he didn't want to cause problems - we have been doing this back and forth thing for almost 8 years. But in the mean time we have both married other ppl. He had second thoughts about marrying her and I had second thoughts about marrying my husband. But I thought that in time it would go away. Recently this other person contacted me by phone to talk - he and his wife are divorcing because he doens't feel as strong about her as he has for me for the past 10 years. I feel the same way but now I have a 2 year old daughter in the picture which changes things alot. I love this person - he was the last thing on my mind b4 I walked down the aisle and he is the last thing I think about b4 I go to sleep. I really don't want to hurt my husband - but we will never have a good marriage with me having these feelings for someone else.
We were thinking of meeting up (he lives in the USA and I live in Canada - 6 hours away) and seeing how it is to be face to face - just to see how we both feel. I already know how I feel but I am really scared to act on my feelings.
Please help me or tell me what I should do before I make a big mistake.
Signatures On
| Sun, 09-26-2004 - 12:13am |
Well, in my opinion, I would say don't go and meet him - not while you're married at least. I mean, let's face it - what do you think is going to happen? I'm sure you are telling yourself you are just going to see how you feel and know whether to stay with your husband or go. But, what will likely happen is that you will both have strong feelings for each other (which you already know) and you will act one them. Which means you will cheat on your husband. Think about your relationship with your husband - do you think you can work it out with him if you just shut off all contact with this other man? If you don't want to be with your husband, then consider getting a divorce. But I would say try to work it out. But it will not work out if you keep this other man in your life. You probably do not want to hurt your daughter by divorcing her dad, but you will also hurt her by cheating on her dad. You are in a tough situation but I really wouldn't go see this man because in your heart I think you know what is going to happen but you are trying to rationalize by saying it is just to see how your feelings are. I think you already know what your feelings are. Sorry so long, this is just my opinion, hope it helps in any way.
