Help am I being fooled
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Help am I being fooled
| Wed, 03-03-2004 - 7:47am |
About 3 months ago I met this guy. I was separted from my husband and his girlfriend just moved out. I even helped him pack up her stuff. We became friends but then we got intimate. We have a great time and we hang out a lot. He has been very clear that right now he does not want to date and likes the arrangement we have. Well the old girlfriend wants back in his life. He has already taken her back once and he has told me up and down he is not going to take her back. Well last night I went to go over his house and she was there and I know she stayed over, but he still took my phonecall and said I could come over if I wanted. He says they are just friends and he is trying to work out closure. What should I do. I really like him, but I am no one's second choice. I just can't seem to stop thinking about him.
Out of control...

He has been up front with you about your relationship so I don't see him as "fooling" you, but you "fooling" yourself.
James
janderson_ny@yahoo.com
CL Ask A Guy
So how are you being fooled? Maybe he led you to believe that he is over his ex when he isn't but he is probably confused about how he feels about her. Regardless, he does not want a relationship with you.
It sounds like both of you are on the rebound.
What else is going on in your life to help you with your breakup and transition? Work,school, friends, volunteering?
~*Cl-marsexpert*~
Co-cl of Ask the relationship saver
"TRUE LOVE DOES NOT COME BY FINDING THE PERFECT PERSON, BUT RATHER LEARNING TO SEE AN IMPERFECT PERSON PERFECTLY." Unknown
As he said to you, this guy is not "complete" with his old relationship. The fact that she was there again shows that he is not done, and still has things to work out. His allowing you to come when she was there was unkind to both you, a power play of sorts - saying that he really didn't need either one. I would back out of this relationship at this time. It never works to be the inbetween, go between relationship, helping someone to break off with someone else. Obviously he needs time to work out all his feelings. He is not ready for an intimate relationship with someone new.
When two people become intimate a bond develops and honesty and trust are needed at this point. It is unwise to develop a bond like this with someone who is not ready, who cannot be trusted and who is going back and forth.
Take good care of yourself.
Best wishes.
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