Help! From committed to just dating

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2004
Help! From committed to just dating
3
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 11:19am
One week ago i got mad at my boyfriend for spending time with a female friend instead of me. Two days later he took me to a renaissance festival for three hours. When he asked to take me home I got upset and started crying. I was upset that hhe didn't want to spend more time with me. His reasons was that: it was his one day off that week, he had some things to do for work and wanted some time by himself. Then he said he didn't want to be my boyfriend anymore, that we should just date (not sex only hugs and kisses).

So I said ok. From that day on until friday, I called him a few times and we talked fine. I didn't try to be clingy. Thursday i said i'd like to see him this weekend and he said "we'll see". Yesterday (saturday) i left a message on his cell phone saying "i hope you're having a good day. would like to talk with you tonight". He sent a text message saying "Im busy". I sent text message back saying "Ok. Talk with you later when you're free?" His message back: "Not tonight".

I'm afraid he doesn't want to see me anymore. What should I do? Do i wait and see if he'll try to see me? I've been trying not to be as clingy as i used to, hoping that would help. Help!!!!
Avatar for northwestwanderer
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 1:04pm
You're calling him repeatedly (as opposed to letting him call you), and that's not "clingy"? Hmm. Under the circumstances, I think it is.

You need to STOP contacting him altogether. Let him call you and ask to see you. If he does, great; if not, he's ready to move on. But you'll never know which it is if you keep calling him.

Sheri

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Sun, 10-17-2004 - 2:34pm
If your recent behavior is not as clingy as before then you are in trouble. You are too pushy and emotional for him and he wants to cool things down so he can have a life outside of you.

Do yourself a favor and get involved in other projects besides a boy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Mon, 10-18-2004 - 10:52am
Hi Lisa, I know exactly how you feel but my advice to you is to try and be strong and let him go. He obviously is losing interest or has found a new person. I know this hurts a lot believe me I'm going through the same thing right now but you must try and find other ways to preoccupy your mind from constantly thinking about him. Once you allow yourself to let go of him you will see all the faults in your relationship and will be happy that you are no longer in it. You will find someone else that wants to spend all of their free time with you but it will not happen until you let go of this guy.