He sounds like he has a ton of issues that need to be resolved before you even get to the point where you're discussing where the two of you stand, especially where there are kids involved.
If you honestly care for him and feel that there's a chance of things working in the future, just make sure he gets the help he needs now. He needs his own counseling (not couples' counseling) to straighten out all the things he's got going on in his life.
Once he gets back on an even keel with himself, you can start working on your relationship. Based on what you've said, it's probably best to take him out of the situation with the children until he's all straightened out. Only you know if he's worth it.
He sounds like he has a ton of issues that need to be resolved before you even get to the point where you're discussing where the two of you stand, especially where there are kids involved.
If you honestly care for him and feel that there's a chance of things working in the future, just make sure he gets the help he needs now. He needs his own counseling (not couples' counseling) to straighten out all the things he's got going on in his life.
Once he gets back on an even keel with himself, you can start working on your relationship. Based on what you've said, it's probably best to take him out of the situation with the children until he's all straightened out. Only you know if he's worth it.
Welcome to the board islandgirle,
Sorry I didn't get to your post before you deleted it. I hope the advice you did get was something you could use.