Help lost in myslef-very long~Sorry

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2007
Help lost in myslef-very long~Sorry
2
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 3:45am
My hubby and I have been together on and off for 14 years. We have a blended family (like oil and vinegar!) of 10 kids. Have been a total nightmare and he has left me several times to go back to the ex wife, then comes back to me this has not happened for awhile now but the problem is still there. She has moved back to our town and now the kids have babies and they are always having get togethers at the ex wives house I refuse to go I don't think I should have to put up with her anymore outside of weddings and such. So he goes without me. Now these kids refuse to consider me the grandma at all and have even told there kids right in front of me and hubby that I am the kind of step grandma. And he wonders why I feel separate from them. WEll as you can imagine our relationship is full of problems but to make it worse now hubby is 48 and sexual things are not working for him like they did when he was younger and this is now my fault and tells me I do not do anything for him. He lays there in bed every night waiting for me to turn him on. Now mind you he hasn't even talked to me all day long and if he does it ends up an argument (to him talking is an argument we cannot talk about anything it ends up a fight!) Plus he thinks everything he watches on tv and in his porn movies is real women walk around ready to have sex at the ring of door bell and that women should act and sound like them without all the kissing or hugging or touching. They are ready at anytime with no prep time. I have tried to tell him I am not a light switch that turns on and off that there are things I need too. WE still have 2 kids at home 9 &15 too so
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 7:47am

>Am I crazy for loving him
Yes.

>Why can I not just tell him to hit the road?
You can. You just don't.

We can't give you much help unless you gather the willpower to help yourself. Until then you're stuck with a miserable life in a miserable family.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 3:27pm

Welcome to the board ?claymom,


He treats you horribly.