He's Great...Should I Dump Him?
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| Sun, 06-20-2004 - 4:49pm |
It moved very quickly. We exchanged I love you's within a month and a half. I was his first everything. We were very happy together and had (have) all the same friends and spent tons and tons of time together. We were "that couple." But I often felt when I was doing something sweet or saying something sweet that it was like I was fulfilling a role, playing a part without an audience.
Over break, I hooked up with a guy. When I came back all my warm fuzzy feelings for Jake were gone, but a friend told me just to wait, it had only been a couple of days. Sure enough by the week's end I was in love again. I told Jake what happened with the guy (though I played it off as less my fault than it was) a month later. He took it so well, just wanted to make sure I was ok, and I didn't find out for weeks that he had been really upset. He was just so caring and giving. Our social lives became even more enmeshed; I hardly have one of my own now. We were like a unit.
Fast forward to now. It's been 2 months since I'd seen him, and I just saw him for 2 days. Again, I felt zip for him. But he is still crazy in love with me. I realize now I gave up a lot my freshman year for the relationship, and I am not sure it was worth it, although he is such a caring, sweet guy who is crazy about me. I also have found myself become attracted to other guys again, which I wasn't at first.
I have already bought tickets to visit him in 2 weeks for a week. What should I do? I am afraid that if I go and see how it goes, I will be persuaded, just by us having a good time, that I should stay in the relationship. But I think I want independence. But I also have had so many good times with him, and love the friends and times we shared.
Bottom line: just because I fall in and out of love, does that mean I should end it? Even given everything I (we'd) be sacrificing? And if I should end it, how? I was thinking of telling him, at the end of the trip, that I think a break would be good for us both.
Please help!!!

Time will tell. And honesty is always the best policy for everyone.