He's not interested in anything

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2003
He's not interested in anything
Wed, 06-04-2003 - 8:41pm
I'm 22 and my live in boyfriend is 24. We've been together for 3 years and we have lived together that long as well. During our 3 years together he has never really been interested in sex. I mean at first he tried not to show it and we did do it once in a while but now it's to the point where he doesn't kiss me or hold me or even come to bed with me before I fall asleep. The only time we have sex is if I throw a fit about it or if he is drunk. I'm just wondering if anyone has any suggestions. I do love him horribly. Any info would be appreciated.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 06-04-2003 - 9:45pm
It is not normal for a 24 year old heterosexual male to not want to have sex with his live-in girlfriend. It's possible that he is gay, and unwilling to admit it. Have you noticed any other behaviors that would indicate that he is gay (like checking out guys, etc.)? Have you asked him why he is uninterested in having sex with you? I think you need to have a very frank talk with him about this. If he refuses to discuss this with you, you don't have much of a relationship.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2003
Thu, 06-05-2003 - 9:53am
I agree that it's quite possible that he's gay, but there could be other explanations.

Is it possible that he had a bad sexual experience before, i.e. being molested or something? Or maybe he feels like he's not "good" at it. Or....this is JUST a possibility.....could he be cheating on you?

The other poster is right...it's NOT normal for a 24-year-old heterosexual male to not like sex. I would definitley talk to him, and if that doesn't help, maybe you could gently suggest that he see a sex therapist.