He's too jealous - Please Help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2004
He's too jealous - Please Help!
1
Mon, 01-26-2004 - 3:51pm
My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year now and we're in a pretty serious relationship. Last weekend I went to a big party with a few girlfriends and he went also. My girlfriends were off dancing and mingling with other guys besides their boyfriends, who were even there and were not bothered by it. My boyfriend, on the other hand, got all upset; asking who I was talking to, if anyone was hitting on me, etc. I am very secure about our relationship and am not a jealous person. I would not really mind if he was talking and mingling with other girls in the night like my friends and their boyfriends were doing. I just wish he was more like that. I have never given him a reason not to trust me. He says that he does, but he is still jealous about me being with other guys. He has been hurt in the past, yet so have I - but much worse. He claims that his jealousy is only because he doesn't have any self-confidence and he's afraid that he's not good enough to keep me. He has never become violent or abusive in any way, but it is starting to really hurt our relationship. How can I get him to overcome this insecurity and stop being jealous all the time???

Please help,

- Desperate
Avatar for lucy4980
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 01-26-2004 - 4:35pm
I don't think that there is anything you can do to help him get over his insecurities and not be jealous all the time. That's all on him. He has got to work on his own issues and you can't expect him to change. The only thing you can do is decide if you are willing to invest your time in a jealous man - is this something you can live with?