his family, him and me

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
his family, him and me
11
Thu, 05-20-2004 - 3:24pm
My b/f and I have been dating 3-1/2 years now. We've been living together for 3 of those years. For the first 2 years, I fit into his family perfectly. I had a falling out with one of them. She has a dominanting personality, is never wrong, and seems very vengeful and spiteful. She has managed to spread rumors about me to the entire family, who are extremely (almost abnormally) close. I have been excluded from family get-togethers, functions, etc. This has been going on for 1-1/2 years now and is getting worse. My b/f seems to have trouble balancing his family and our relationship. His family, mostly his brothers and their wives, have planned get togethers, parties, etc., he ends up going without me and lately has been coming home the next morning. How can I get his family to mind their own business and stay out of ours?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2004
Fri, 05-21-2004 - 12:04pm
That's is where I'm at now. Keeping my distance, trying to keep a cool, mature head and trying not to fall into their little games. I've gotten e-mails from a mystery woman who says there's a man friend of mine who's very concerned about my well-being. I've gotten phone calls where I answer the other person just "pants" and then hangs up. What surprises me the most is that the mom is so oblivious to all of this. She knows what's going on but stays out of it. I've been told by the mom, though, that I needed to appologize to each and every person in this family. When I ask what I did, her reply is that she doesn't have to tell me, I should know what I did/said. I finally had to just put this situation on a shelf. The more I try to avoid it, the more it seems to come back, still making no sense. It's terrible to know there are people out there who enjoy treating people like a doormat. No compassion, no sympathy, just hurtful games.

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