How can I help him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-22-2007
How can I help him?
1
Sun, 09-28-2008 - 10:21am

I have been seeing this guy for a while. I care about him deeply, and he is slightly older than me (14 years) and he lives far away. Even so, our "relationship" keeps getting better and better as time goes on. Eventually, I will want it to be a serious relationship.

However, there are a few things that are bothering me. I'm afraid he drinks too much. He ran a marathon about a year a go and gave up drinking for training for the marathon. But lately, it seems he's been drinking more. He says it takes a lot for him to get drunk, but he's called me a few times drunk before. What is worse is we both work for the same company and recently he found out that his project is fazing out, and soon he will need to look for a job. The day he found that out he went to an outing and got drunk. In addition, I know he went to a party last night and I fear he did the same thing.

He's really health conscious, always tries to eat well, but he still drinks. I don't know the extent to his drinking, just what I stated above, because I'm not there all the time. I want to know what I should do, should I tell him what's bothering me, or just wait it out because he's having a tough time. I told him he can talk to me anytime about his job but it just worries me, that a guy of his age, is still out partying and drinking. His motto is to "live in the moment." And I think that's great, but sometimes you have to think about the future. Am I overreacting??

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 09-29-2008 - 1:05pm

Welcome to the board shinystar24,


Read the book: Are You the One for Me? by Barbara DeAngelis.


If drinking is a deal breaker for you, you can only tell him and let