How long does it take? So hard to do!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2004
How long does it take? So hard to do!!!
4
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 8:54pm
Im trying to get over my x. We were together for 7 months, then he dumped me. He seen me with my best friend who is a guy, and he assumed that i was seeing him on the side, being the reason he dumped me. The x called me on my cell, but i never returned his call, because i dont want to be drilled with questions. Probably my fault? My x has wanted to meet him, but my best friend doesnt like him. They have never met. He doesnt call or try to make any contact with me at all. I see him, but he doesnt even bother to look at me or acknowledge my existence. We been apart for a little over 3 months now. Im trying to keep myself busy, but i cant stop thinking about him no matter what i do. I'll have a dream about him,and all my feelings just resurface. You cant stop the dreams from coming. I miss him alot. Im trying to figure how long it would take to get over him? Aslong as i see him, the feelings resurface, no matter how hard i try not to show my pain, it still hurts. I was with him, and i loved him to death. He was so different from the other guys i've dated. He had all the physical qualites any women would want in a man, and he was just an awesome guy.The sex was awesome, and he always pleased me sexually, making sure i got off ,before anything else every single time! He works with kids teaching them how to play sports, other than his other job. He treated me so well. He feels i cheated on him, and i actually didnt. Me not returning his call probably proved the point. I've taken him for granted. We've fought before, and each time, i came crawling back to him, because it was my fault. This is the longest time, and i dont know what to say to him.Im tired of apologizing. He is a MAN, and not a boy like the other guys i've dated. For him to just drop what we had, and walk away amazes me. He shows no feelings, or pain. He just shows happiness all the time. Our break up doesnt phaze him a bit, like nothing does anyways. I just miss him so much,and i want him back.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 9:03pm
'He is a MAN, and not a boy'

No a man doesn't assume you are untrustworthy when you have done nothing wrong.

A man doesn't ignore you.

A man doesn't let you take the blame each time something goes wrong.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 6:21am
hmmmm, "A MAN and not a boy." A real man is attentive, wants to know what's going on, doesn't jump to conclusions, doesn't drill questions, etc. Even a womanizer can give great sex cause they've learned how to do that. A real man is a human being.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2004
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 11:04am
Sorry to bash ya!

BUT - Why did'nt u return his call? What's he suppose to think, since you did'nt return his call? Sounds like you did'nt even care to enough to explain the situation. He wanted to know what was going on, so he called you out on your action. Why not take responsiblity for your actions? I've been in this same situation and i walked away as well, because she could'nt even deny it, or better yet, gohead and lie to me about it.

Its not his fault. He walked away as just about any man would do, if you cant take the responsibility for your action. He wanted an answer and didnt get it. WHY? Maybe you were hiding something? You took him for granted? Of course he's gonna jump to a conclusion being you couldnt return his call and explain yourself. You would of done the same

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2003
Wed, 06-09-2004 - 11:16am
Well maybe you have made a mistake, maybe you should have answered the phone and let him no what was going on he feels that because you avoided his call that you were guilty of wrongdoing. If you want him back ask him to meet you somewhere private and tell him how you feel, tell him why you didn't answer the phone and see what happens from there. Good luck let us know what happens.