How to rejuvenate relationship?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
How to rejuvenate relationship?
3
Mon, 09-03-2007 - 8:07pm

My boyfriend and I have been together almost 1.5 years. We just had a talk about our relationship and both agreed that things have become routine and that things aren't the same as they used to be. I still love him as much as I used to, but I'm not sure that he feels the same way about me anymore. He told me that our relationship is work now (to which I replied that relationships take work), that we seem to have hit a wall and aren't really moving forward, and he asked me if it is possible that maybe we aren't compatible anymore. Neither of us could point to anything that the other is either not doing or is doing wrong, so we're not sure what to fix. The one major issue in our relationship right now is that we are both finishing grad school in May and have different goals about where we want to live. I don't know if he is subconsciously holding back in the relationship because he's not willing to live where I want to or is afraid of commitment. Also, this is the longest relationship he's ever been in, so maybe he doesn't know how to handle it when things get rough or when the initial excitement disappears.

I really love this guy and see us together for the long-term if we can grow close again. I feel that we only have a short time to fix our relationship before he decides that this relationship is too much work and we break up. Any suggestions on how to bring back the excitement that we once had, and how to grow close again? Thanks!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2007
Mon, 09-03-2007 - 9:12pm
my relationship seems to be going the same way as yours down the tubes and i want to put it back together and so does he but he doesnt want to try i dont want to lose him because he has made such an impact on my life but if things dont get better we are going to break up and i dont want that but i just want to be with him
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Tue, 09-04-2007 - 11:38am

Welcome to the board lonelycat,


It could be the stress of upcoming changes....

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Thu, 09-06-2007 - 4:42pm
Thanks for those book names; I will check them out. Does anyone else have any other advice?