is this a husband?
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is this a husband?
| Tue, 11-13-2007 - 10:12pm |
hi,my name is birgit,y friend posted things with you,but now i have a problem. what am i supposed to do. he ownse a business,whitch right now does not go good due to legal matters. he doesnt want me to work,i am married for 11years. i used to get allowance the last year has been hell,he has all these creditcards,whitch he uses,i cant even get an apple if i wanted to,latley he has been spending to much time with his friends,playing poker,going out drinking,etc. he leaves me here with not a dime,but he goes everywhere,whatever he wants he gets, me i feel like a maid,cleaning cooking etc. then when he is not with his friends he rants and rages,calls me names,i am stupid,cant work,etc. what am i sopposed to do.jobs are hard to get here,the one i like,or know how to do,i tried recently just to proof to him i will do it.but my age i am turning 50 and ive been out of work since i been with him,everything is in his name,i cant get nothing from anymore,he doesnt even ask if i need something,ever. when he comes home,unless his friends come,he sleeps,its imposdible to even get a conversation going,he sreams at me lie i am a child,i feel like i am one. he is so selfish,well i knew israelies are like his,but not that bad.he never spends one second with me ever. what can i do,i am about to leave him,

By not allowing you to work or spend your own money... He is keeping you from having any independence whatsoever. It's his way of controlling you, of keeping you dependent on him so you can neither leave nor make any decisions for yourself.
No... that's not a husband.
It sounds to me as though you are in an abusive relationship and are a semi-prisoner in your own life. You do not need to stay there and receive this kind of treatment. But, you also need to be careful when you leave. I suggest you get in touch with some support groups for abused women and find out more about your entire situation and how to protect yourself in all kinds of ways. Even though you are 50 and have been out of the workforce for awhile there are many jobs for you....you can start simply and grow. Get yourself involved with women's support groups and you will be guided on how to handle things, step by step.
Best wishes,
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Welcome to the board faces6,
I agree with Dr. Shoshanna that you are in an abusive relationship. He is controlling and verbally/mentally abusive. He is not the kind of husband that you deserve.
If you left him would you be able to stay with family or friends?
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