Husband has a young single female friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2012
Husband has a young single female friend
11
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 12:52pm

This is gonna be kinda long but I dont know what to do and need advice.

My husband and I have been married for 10 yrs and have 4 children. He has always made friends very easily...male and female. Im will admit I tend to be jeleous when he meets a new female friend but he is military so they are usually females he works with and I have met them and have become my friends as well.Untill now.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 12:56pm

You have every right to be sorry........but SCARED?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 1:05pm

That was a very restrained response, fissatore.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 1:07pm

The first one was invisible ink!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2012
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 1:32pm

I cant see what the texts say online only how often and what time....I have tried to check his phone but he always has it with him. The times I have looked there were none to or from her and the one time their was it really was about baseball but it was in a sort of flirty way. I have always been the type to let people walk allover me for fear of them leaving but I have had enough. I can handle female friends that Iknow and not 18!!! Im about to be 30 dont need some teeny bober chatting up my husband or my hubby chatting up some young girl. Gonna have to put on my big girl panties and talk to him....

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 2:24pm

Yes this is crazy behavior.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2012
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 2:43pm

He was upfront with me about the night they first met...but once I found out they were still communicating and I got mad he has continued behind my back. I wouldnt really like it even if he was open about the friendship they have but beats him being sneaky. She is obviously important to him because he has always said no friendship is worth me being upset.....well he knows how I feel and STILL does it. Him calling her over the weekend he was gone has me so sick.I wanted to wait till I had phone bill in hand and then confront so he couldnt say I was snooping but not sure I can wait any longer!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 2:43pm
The fact that he's hiding her and there seems to be a lot of texts and calls going on between them isn't good. I mean how much can they be talking about baseball? Sounds more like she's got some high school girl crush on him and he's enjoying the ego boost, attention and validation he's getting from this young gal. In all honesty, what 32 yr.old man would'nt be flattered by and enjoying some18 yr. old gal showing interest in him? Problem is he's responding to it. Sounds like he's forgetting he's a married man with 4 children. This is all highly inappropriate for him to be calling and texting her like that and he knows it too, otherwise he would not be hiding it. I mean she's already telling him "crossing the line would be fun" Who knows what he answered to comments like this. Bottom line is you need to put the kabash on this ASAP before it escalates into a full blown affair. And with him being away from home it easily could cause men can easily compatmentalize things like this and not feel too guilty about it. PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN NOW. GOOD LUCK.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2012
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 5:22pm

Thanks everyone...itsone thing to hear it from family....another from people you dont know. I just needed some validation that Im not some crazy pyscho for being upset.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-05-2006
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 6:39pm

As to what they might have in common, you might be surprised.

At 43, I started chatting with a 15 year old (M-F from work), of which I kept my wife informed and she never objected,

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2012
Thu, 01-19-2012 - 7:42pm

Well regardless of if they have things in common it should have never happened. What happened with you is my exact fear. When your married you shouldnt be doing anything that could come between you. All themore reason to talk to him now. Thanks

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