Husband's Jealousy
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Husband's Jealousy
| Fri, 07-09-2004 - 11:33am |
My husband is extreamly jealous. He constantly accuses me of being interested in someone else. He worries if I am gone shopping over an hour or I'm a few min late comming home from work. I bought some new shirts last week and cannot wear them to work because he thinks I'm trying to attract someone here. I have never been unfaithful to him but his exwife was. What do I do? This is driving me crazy. I never know what his reaction will be to anything for example I was talking about work and said my boss's name and he asked me if I had a thing for him now. He says he's just worried and if he doesn't say anything and get reassurance from me it buggs him and buggs him until he's upset. I have told him that his accusations are disrespectful to me and make me feel like he thinks I'm a slut. His solution is that I shouldn't get mad when he askes me. My solution is to quit obsessing about worrying that I will find someone else.

Sorry can't help you much but knowing that there are so many others dealing with the same problem might help.
I know you love your husband and I wish you luck. By nature I am not a quitter and I believe that there is always a solution out there.
Good Luck to you
Carrie
I know it sounds a little cheezy but I know it makes me feel a whole hell of alot better, and puts me in a really good mood. if you haven't, give it a try the worst thats goona happen is he might kiss you back :-)
Good luck
Dana
Your husband's suspiciousness is way over the line. Clearly, he hasn't worked through the trauma he suffered with his past wife and is projecting the entire situation onto you now. The effects of this are negative for you, and his possessiveness and jealousy can only increase if not handled. Let him know that he has a problem and it is getting worse. Let him know it is related to his former marriage, but being acted out on you and having bad effects on you. Insist that he get help for this. He cannot work it through alone, because a great deal of this is unconscious and deeply painful and emotional for him. Unless he is willing to go to a therapist and work through this irrational behavior there is no way to get past what is going on.
Women in situations like this often feel themselves more and more constricted and worthless. Don't buy into it. Know that it is his illness. But also know that he can become a bit dangerous or abusive if he really believes his delusions here. You have to take good care of yourself as well. Don't let this just go on without the proper attention and help it requires.
Best wishes.
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