Husband's past cheating

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-04-2004
Husband's past cheating
1
Tue, 08-03-2004 - 2:57pm
In 2001, when my now-husband and I were still just living together, he cheated on me with his ex-wife. She is a very bad woman, who did many evil things to him. She is a lesbian and lives with another woman. Six weeks after we broke up, we got back together. She did not take long to show here true colors. I forgave my husband, after much discussion, totally. Four months later, in February 2002, we got engaged. We married in November 2002. The problem.... I found his ex-wife's phone number in a 2004 date book. They have no children together, so there is no reason he would need to call her. I promptly threw out the phone number. But I haven't mentioned to him that I found it. He has not really acted any different to me. When he cheated on me in 2001, I knew something was up ie. we had sex alot less often. He is acting absolutely no different. Should I bring up the fact that I found the number? I really don't think he is cheating on me now. But the curiousity is awful!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2004
Tue, 08-03-2004 - 3:18pm
I understand what you are saying? Curosity that the need to know came play wonders on you...If you don't think he is cheating then what is the reason for telling him? It may cause you greater harm him thinking that you don't trust him. I am going through that now. My husband feels like I questioned his integrity and has a HUGE problem with it!! As someone told me yesterday don't say nothing that you don't have concrete evidence on!! I think that when we've been hurt before we tend to jump the gun and think the worse all of the time! If we consume our selves with the worse thoughts all the time...then when are we going to give our selves the opportunity to be happy? I was in doubt and still kind of am about a situation. So I am trying to practice what I am telling you NOW! I thought about it long time last night, and I feel that my best bet is just to let it go and pray on it! Chances are you are over reacting like me! Good Luck & God Bless!