I am so confused....

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2004
I am so confused....
2
Sat, 01-24-2004 - 2:28am
I’m extremely confused! Could use any advice or thoughts!!! I am 25 yrs old and I have been with my current boyfriend (who is 24) for the past 5 yrs. When we first started dating, he was the male version of myself! 5 years later, he is the same and I have grown up a lot! We have grown apart instead of closer together!

This past year I have been communicating with another guy who is in the same line of work as I am (banking). He is 24 yrs old and has been in a relationship with this 20 yr old for the past 2 ½ yrs. We have been talking by phone and email during work hours and I fell in love with his personality! We have a lot in common! We have the same viewpoints, same goals, and have experienced some of the same obstacles in life(I just lost my father in December 2002 and then went through 6 more deaths in my family in 2003 and he lost both his parents)

In November, he actually came to my work and we met in person for the first time! We actually hit it off and we started hanging out (without our other half knowing). Just recently we ended up having sex. I know I should’ve felt bad but everything felt so natural! I want to be with this guy but I don’t know what to do!!! There are other people’s hearts involved! Any advice?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2004
Sat, 01-24-2004 - 6:25am
I would say you need to end things with your boyfriend. If you have been forming a new relationship for a year, your heart is obviously no longer in your relationship. I know it is hard, but it's the only thing to do if you are going to be happy. Good luck!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Sat, 01-24-2004 - 10:39am
People change drstically between 19 and 25 in my opinion. It makes perfect sense that you two have both changed, indifferent ways, and no longer have as much in common.

You say you are more mature than he is now. Then I think you should do the adult thing and break up with him and stop lying and cheating on him. Does he at least deserve that?