I could really use some advice/help.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2008
I could really use some advice/help.
5
Fri, 05-23-2008 - 8:20pm
thanks for your advice, everyone.


Edited 5/24/2008 3:22 pm ET by littlelizzie92
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2008
Fri, 05-23-2008 - 8:57pm

"he would take the normal male route of pretending that nothing was wrong,"


Yes, you are absolutely right, all males do this without exception.


"

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-23-2008
Fri, 05-23-2008 - 9:18pm
You completely misinterpreted everything that I was saying.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sat, 05-24-2008 - 12:12am

Welcome to the board littlelizzie92,


::he would take the normal male route of pretending that nothing was wrong, and avoiding the topic completely.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2008
Sat, 05-24-2008 - 2:48am
Not from my perspective.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sat, 05-24-2008 - 8:30am

I hope you understand that things turned out for the best whether or not they feel good right now... He became emotionally unavailable to you, and really it just wasn't working out. I know what it's like to be a woman and have the weakness where even if your relationship is going terribly, you want to "make it work" and will throw all systems to 100% capacity trying to get him to open up just because you have feelings for him.

Lizzie I know you don't see it now, but what's happening is a bad relationship dying. That's what happens to bad relationships. Some get closure and some don't, I'm sorry that he's not communicating with you about why but isn't that part of why you're breaking up? It's just not working. You can't have a relationship when all you do is argue and push one another's buttons. It doesn't make sense to carry on in a situation where you are so frustrating to one another and can't talk about it... And especially can't see one another.

I don't think you should make plans with him when you're home unless you want to break up in person. What worries me is the possibility that everything will be peachy face-to-face and present a deceitfully hopeful outlook on your relationship that simply doesn't exist under the circumstances of you being able to see one another face to face. So if you need closure do the relationship then take it, but don't see him under the pretense of your relationship continuing. You know you're not happy with it.